Remembering
By
Debbie Bailey
We've
just experienced another holiday season. We all have
done something, even if it has been our choice to (actively)
do nothing! Although our traditions may differ, the
one thing we all have in common is that we will register
some memory of it. We have little niches where we will
catalogue memories and, for better or for worse, they
will remain impressed in our psyche. As we age, we have
the opportunity to review and often celebrate the circumstances
of our past. Interestingly, it seems as time passes,
our memory of past often struggles.
We
have a bi-monthly program at my facility simply called
Remembering. It is a compilation of resident contributions
of memories. Some people sing old songs and some tell
tales of experiences about such things as the party-line
telephone and even outhouses. Modern technology and
engineering feats have made those two examples obsolete,
but our memories about them are not. Our Remembering
program becomes an affirmation of collective memory.
The communal endeavor also transcends any potential
for nursing care issues. Most residents identify with
the circumstance, but each has a unique story. The way
this program develops is very simple. In our case, a
retired English teacher puts out a flyer asking for
stories. Then, she helps write the story for presentation.
Family members love to see these stories documented
because they become immediate heirlooms.
One
of the books in The Best Years of Our Lives series,
Ken Tate commented, "One of the most interesting
lessons he learned about life is how subjective nostalgia
can be. There is a Latin quote that augments that sentiment
that states, "Things hard to bear grow pleasant
to relate." A perfect example would be the stories
that have arisen from the depression and war years.
James Hillman, in his book, The Force of Character,
says that "if past time is not to be lost time,
one must give it presence." That is exactly what
we do in our series. Residents from all levels of care
attend and participate and family members are there,
too, to see Mom or Dad. What a gleefully proud role-reversal
moment!
Reminiscent
programs have so many positive aspects to them and participation
in them have influences that ripple through the generations.
This article is meant to be an encouragement to expand
your current programming and an invitation to share
your ideas and experiences with us. Let's make it our
tradition to make the choice to seek ways to honor remembering.
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